Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Foreign.
[00:00:13] Speaker B: Welcome, everyone, to another episode of the Jonathan Project podcast, where iron is sharpening iron. And we take the inspiration for this show from Jonathan and his good friend David and future king. We help men navigate the complexities of the world around them. And if you want me and Jason to come on out to a men's event, if you have a business function, something where you found inspiration from listening to our show, please reach out to us at the Jonathan Project podcastmail.com Again, the Jonathan Project podcastmail.com Jason, good to see you.
[00:00:50] Speaker A: Welcome to the show.
[00:00:52] Speaker B: Welcome to the show. You know, it's good that digital doesn't cost you anything. Like, right. You can restart because this is the second week in a row me and Jason have been having a good time laughing. And for you guys don't know, this is like, take number four to get in the show. But that's okay. We like to have fun.
[00:01:12] Speaker A: That's. That is true. That is true.
So, well, how's it going? How's it going this week?
[00:01:19] Speaker B: It's cold. It's cold again in Florida. I don't know. It's like somebody's drunk winter showed up again and knocked on my door.
[00:01:25] Speaker A: Dude, that's. That's bad. It's cold here in Alabama.
[00:01:29] Speaker B: Well, that's real cold there. Like, here. It's like. Yeah, it's like 42. And I'm like, man, this is. This is not good.
[00:01:36] Speaker A: That sends people into shock down there.
[00:01:38] Speaker B: It does. You know, it's like, what is happening?
[00:01:41] Speaker A: It got down into the 20s last night. So I got up this morning, you know, took care of the. The famous chicken drama of, you know, thought out their water and took care of them.
[00:01:52] Speaker B: I love it. The chicken kingdom.
[00:01:55] Speaker A: Yep. Good times. Good times. All right, so this week. This.
[00:01:59] Speaker B: This week, what are we talking about?
[00:02:01] Speaker A: So I was kind of. I was kind of thinking, and here's the deal. So my nephew also, before we get started, hey, want to make sure. Send some prayers out to the Avery family. They got some things that are going on. They so got those prayer requests in and want to make sure that we include those.
Okay. So I was out this past week, and it was my nephew's Cub Scout get a. Get a badge kind of ascension thing. Right?
As I'm sitting there, I'm sitting in the back, and what I notice is, is there are a ton of these. These dads, right? And it's. They're on their phones, they're not paying attention and so forth. Right. They're just not paying attention, and it's Their kids up there. And I'm thinking to myself, and what's going on? Like you're sending a message to that child. And it made me stop and think about Proverbs, right. In chapter 17, Solomon Way smarter than I am. In chapter 176 he goes, Children are the crown of old man and the glory of children on their fathers. In other words, parents are the pride of their children. They, they're not too worried if the grandparents are paying attention. Although grandparents are always paying attention. Right. But they're watching for their parents to pay attention. And you know, it really dawned on me as I'm sitting there, like these guys are sending a message and it's a worthless message.
[00:03:31] Speaker B: Right.
[00:03:31] Speaker A: I'm not judging, I'm just discerning that the fruit you're producing is not very, it's not very good.
[00:03:37] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:03:38] Speaker A: And you know, you miss it. One day it's going to cross guys minds that when you, when your kids were little, they waited on you at the door to come home from work. When they come home from college, you'll be waiting on them to show up.
[00:03:54] Speaker B: No, that's very true, Jason.
[00:03:55] Speaker A: You know, and that's, that's it, right? You'll wait on them to call, you'll wait on them to, to do whatever, to spend time, anything to spend time with them.
And we, we have to be very purposeful in our conversations with them, in both the words we say, in our actions.
I thought about that quite a bit.
[00:04:15] Speaker B: No, you know, I'm excited to be able to bring this conversation to guys because, you know, as me and you discussed, you know, different generations and you know, we grew up with, you know, you know, that post World War II parents, you know, our grandparents were part of the greatest generation. And, and so I feel like sometimes that, that intentional communication, whether it was criticism or compliments, whenever they may have come, you know, it did leave you as a child. Kind of like, man, like, what is going on? You know, and you were looking for those moments I'll never forget.
Fence had kind of broken down and we were gonna, we're gonna put it back up. That's what you're just gonna do. And I had an old school post hole digger and I wasn't doing it quite right. And I remember being told point blank by my dad, like, you're gonna figure it out and we're gonna just keep digging holes until you get it right.
[00:05:15] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:05:16] Speaker B: You know, and it was like this intense kind of, you know, kind of criticism. But you know, fathers can shape their children's faith Identity and character and we have to that they're little sponges right around us soaking up everything that you do, good and bad and make no bones about it. You know, it is an eye openening event when you come to realize as a child and there's a moment that happens, it's never really said or spoken when you realize that your parents have flaws and mistakes and issues. They went from, like you said, being that mythical kind of hero and imperfect in your eyes. And now being a parent. I get it. It's kind of not fair. It's not right for this. The truth.
[00:05:54] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:05:54] Speaker B: It makes me more aware of how I need to be intentional and how I'm communicating verbally or non. Verbally.
[00:06:00] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:06:00] Speaker B: You know, Ephesians 6 and 4 is really going to be the scripture guys and gals and everyone that's listening out there.
[00:06:06] Speaker A: Sure.
[00:06:06] Speaker B: This whole conversation. Fathers, do not provoke or mothers do not provoke your children's anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
[00:06:14] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:06:15] Speaker B: So we have to be intentional in all that we do.
[00:06:17] Speaker A: You know, as I've gotten older, I've realized there's a lot less crisis or maybe it's the fact that I've seen some real crisis and I think that's where it goes back to, you know, and, and just kind of hitting back as, as well. On the proverbs thing on 17, he's like, children are the crown of old men. I think as you get older you're just like, man, it's going to work out. That's great. Right. Like we're, we're keeping the bus between the lines, you know, and as a Christian dad, my number one northern star compass moment is, are my children growing closer to Christ overall or, or less. Right. What's, what's their growth?
Are they headed towards Jesus or are they not our children going to make mistakes? Yes. Are you going to make mistakes? If you don't believe that, head on out to the local swimming pool. Today's a great day to test this theory because it's super cold. If you can walk on water, great. But if you can't, it'll be self evident in a few minutes. Most of us can't. We're not perfect. Just like you said about in Ephesians 6:4, don't provoke your kids to anger. You know, our children are more than the genetic, the, the DNA that we gave. Right. They're not Mini Me's. They aren't. They may share a lot of characteristics, but they're different people. And, and how we handle that important, right? How we, how we foster that.
[00:07:45] Speaker B: Yeah, you know, I, I think it's a good point, Jason. Like there, there's two, there's two sides of this coin as far as we're talking about being intentional and communicating. One is criticism. Right. I share that personal example. Like, hey, that criticism back in. Like, hold the flashlight straight. Like, don't move the light.
[00:08:03] Speaker A: Like we're actually hold flashlight where I can see it.
[00:08:07] Speaker B: Not you, not where you can see it. But a lot of us guys have. Or give me the Phillips head or needle nose, pliers, whatever. We all have those kind of experiences of going to the tool chest and getting the wrong thing and getting it tore off the frame. But being intentional in criticism is not a negative thing. I want to, I want to be able to make sure that we don't leave guys confused. Like, are you doing this gentle parenting kind of thing? Are you guys trying to be free range parent? Is that what you. No, that's not what we're saying, guys, because the Bible is very clear that you're supposed to discipline. God disciplines us. But you have to correct from a sense of love. Right? Yeah. Proverbs 3 and 12 says, for the Lord reproves him who love who he loves as a father, the son in whom he delights. Right. Colossians 3, 21. Fathers, do not embitter your children or they will become discouraged. So, you know, I think about when we correct our children, you know, we have to do it in a way that's going to lead to some growth, that is going to not build resentment. And explaining, hey, this is why we're having first correction. This is why I'm trying to guide you that, hey, who you think are your friends now here doing all this crazy stuff? That's not where we want to go. But you have to be in a place where I'm not judging you for making similar mistakes or whatever, but I'm trying to help you grow and to get to a better place. If that makes, you know, some sense for the folks out there.
[00:09:30] Speaker A: Yeah, if you think I'm a free range parent, my, my kids right now would be laughing. They would absolutely. They, they would be like, who is this? Who is this man on this screen?
It's. No, you gotta be there. You're an active part. Right?
[00:09:46] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:09:47] Speaker A: And I think about it, you know, the things, the words we say, the things we do. And I do think a lot about in Samuel. Right, right. Samuel 20, 30, 30 through 42, it talks about where David, he tells, he Tells Jonathan. He says, hey, man, Saul's going to try to kill me. And he's like, nah, it's my dad. He's not going to do it. They go back and forth, and he says, all right, here's the banquet. Tell him I had to leave. So, sure enough, he tells him. He's like, where's David? And Jonathan goes, he had to go meet with his brethren. And that's the King James version. Brethren. And he goes. And so Saul yells at him, and he basically is like, you're not my son. Like, I don't know, you know? Yeah. He. He pulls a smokey in the Bandit, you know, Jackie Gleason, not my kid. And he yells at him. And then Jonathan defends David because that's what kids do, you know?
[00:10:46] Speaker B: Yeah. That was strike number two.
[00:10:47] Speaker A: Yeah. He. He decided it's time to speak up, and so he does. And the next thing is Saul. Chunks of javelin at him. Right.
Those are. Javelin at it, and.
Which obviously damaged their relationship, but even in the end, you know, they were. They were together. Right? Yeah.
But you got to think about it as dads, are we. Are we tossing javelins? Are we guiding? Or what are we doing?
[00:11:16] Speaker B: No, that's.
[00:11:18] Speaker A: Those words mean something, right? Yeah. When you correct somebody, it's got to be purposeful, and you got to do it without crushing that spirit. Right.
[00:11:27] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:11:28] Speaker A: This isn't. Hey, man, this isn't counseling, where, you know, we got to get to base zero.
[00:11:34] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:11:34] Speaker A: You know, it's not that. It's. It's. Let's move forward with very purposeful conversations.
[00:11:41] Speaker B: No, I. I love it. Jason. And I think another example as. As we. You know, we're talking about, like, being intentional with criticism and coming from a perspective of love. I thought about. And I. And I looked at this week, one of our favorite stories to talk about men on here, which we haven't dove into fully, but is Samson and his father. Manoah. Right. His warning. And this is something that translates even to modern times for us. Warnings against ungodly influences. Right. That is probably one of the biggest for. And I know my good friend on the screen is entering the teenage years, and I'm not. I'm fast behind him with. With the son on that, but, you know. Judges 14, 2, 3. Samson's father warns him not to marry a Philistine woman, knowing it will pull him away from God. So imagine. Yeah. I mean, a lot of fathers, men out there listening, and you get to that situation where you can see something with your son, your daughter, like, man, this is not the person that is best for you or this friend best for you or this, you know, school choice is not the best for you. Right. And you have to be able to guide your children through making those wise choices and in those relationships, friendships, or those big decisions. So I think about something that you said, Jason, is that if you don't start right where you're at right now and start building a platform to fight from, you can't go when that. When that time comes, you're facing one of those decisions, you're not really going to have something to stand on. And this is why we say you have to be intentional. You have to stand and you have to be the one in the house sometimes that says, hey, everybody's going right, but we're going left. And here's why. It's not for dad just to be like, I'm anti phone, I'm anti you talking to whatever. Whatever it is, anti wearing that kind of clothing. It's because there are ungodly consequences. You know, that's going to come down the pipe by you going down this path, and that's being intentional in criticism, and that's not a bad thing, you know, but you have to be able to step up and do that, you know?
[00:13:46] Speaker A: No, that's. Absolutely. I was thinking about that phrase of the ground you're going to fight from when they are teenagers is the ground you've already won when they were small. That's not to say it's a lost cause. If they're teenagers, you just have an uphill battle and it means you got to spend time with them and you've got to be a part of that life. Never forget that you are the pride of their life. It's.
It is the way it is. It's. Children want to. They may pretend like they don't like you, but truth is, is they do. But they're kids.
It dawned on me, years of, you know, kind of studying psychology and cognitive development, that so our brain infrastructure doesn't fully develop. Right. I've heard this all, all, all my life, but was reading it in a. In a textbook and kind of watching some videos on it and listening to some lectures. That's the truth. Like, they don't have the cognitive infrastructure. The roller coaster of neurons and development hasn't got to that part of the amusement park yet called common sense.
It just hasn't. It isn't built. And so that's where you got to step in. And they don't even realize it's not built yes, sir.
It's when you see kids and if you're like, well, what do you want to do? There's times that's great. It really is.
[00:15:15] Speaker B: Sure.
[00:15:15] Speaker A: You know, but in a lot of things, as you take an active step in a parent and have those purposeful conversations of whether or not I'm crushing that soul or am I guiding or am I throwing javelins or what am I doing. Right.
[00:15:28] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:15:29] Speaker A: You have to realize that these are decisions. We don't, we don't let kids take a 7,000 pound truck and drive it at 80 miles an hour down the road.
We hope not. Right. Like, we hope not.
So these are same kind of decisions.
[00:15:47] Speaker B: Right.
[00:15:48] Speaker A: Let's help God through this process.
[00:15:50] Speaker B: Yes, sir. Yes, sir. You know, and so I think that it's a good segue into the opposite side of the coin. Right. Being intentional and encouragement and speaking life. Right. James tells us that there's power, there's life and death in the tongues. And for all the everyone that's listening out there, we all can remember something, as Jason said, where our little souls got crushed. And I don't think it was malicious or intentional. I think people don't know. Again, in the heat of the moments, in different settings of how you were raised, in different things, of that power. And we can all remember those sharp and biting words. But Proverbs 16 and 24, gracious words are like a honeycomb sweetness to the soul and health of the body. Matthew 3 and 17, this is my beloved son, who I'm well pleased. Right. Encouragement should not just focus on your achievements, but character and faith. And that's something that we see time and time again being reiterated, you know, throughout the Bible, is that, you know, you have to build someone up. Right. Jesus didn't come around and point out like, oh man, you dirty sinners over here. Look at you. I know what you did. You can't find that. Think about the woman at the well.
[00:16:59] Speaker A: Oh, man, he just talked to her.
[00:17:01] Speaker B: He just talked to her. And even though he pointed out like, hey, I know the husband that you're with ain't your husband and you had five others. Yeah, it wasn't saying that. Hey, you're a pick up expletive for someone that likes to sleep around. He didn't do that.
[00:17:16] Speaker A: Yeah, we got terms for that.
[00:17:18] Speaker B: We do have terms for that.
[00:17:19] Speaker A: Not only that, but he didn't sugarcoat wrong. Right. He didn't sugarcoat the wrong. And he's like, hey, it's wrong. We're calling wrong wrong. Yeah, let me show you how to redeem it, right? Let's. Let's get to a path of redemption. The whole Bible's about redemption. And I think about John Mark and Paul, right?
And we think about times we all got our souls crushed. And so here's. Here's John Mark. John Mark goes, you know, and Paul's like, hey, man, what do you mean you're turning back? I think. I think John Mark was pretty young, right? And he's like, what do you mean you're turning back? We're pressing forward. I've been shipwrecked, bit by snakes. We're moving forward. By the way, you know, he's. He's a go getter, right? Yeah. He's moving in a direction.
And you know, that had to crush John Mark soul because he's like, I love God and I love Jesus, and I just want to do this. And the guy, the guy who wrote a ton of the New Testament later, he didn't write it, you know, back then. He didn't have it. But he goes, get out of here. Like, man, I ain't got no use for you. You know, that crushed his soul. But if you look. And this is where you and I were kind of talking about it, look at Peter. Peter calls him in first. Peter, he calls him my spiritual son. Peter took time to heal him and to grow him, right? And then in second Timothy4.11, as Paul is getting ready to die, and he goes, send Mark to me. You know, he took. He made sure those purposeful words were restorative.
[00:18:58] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:19:00] Speaker A: Peter, you know, when he failed Jesus, right? Man, that was crushing blow. We've talked about a ton. When Jesus restored him, he asked him three times, you know, do you love me? And he's cooking over the same kind of fire that Peter was warming himself by the coals, like the charcoal versus wood, right? Same one. It's. It's that how do you restore? How do you get. Get them back on the track?
[00:19:27] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:19:28] Speaker A: You know, it's not, to quote my father, who will listen to this, a bought lesson is better than a taught lesson, which was a good way of saying, I'm going to let you touch that electric fence. And I don't have to discuss this twice.
[00:19:42] Speaker B: No, you know, there's. There's something to that, I think, even. Right. Like sometimes, you know, hey, as my dad would say, like, if you want to skate uphill, go ahead, give it a shot. Like these little sayings. But I think, you know, as we look at, like, what's the practical thing as far as that encouragement, kind of like what you're talking about. You have to make affirmation a part of your normal communication because kids, all of us can see through, like, okay, oh, here comes daddy's trying to be fake and good. Like, what's up with this? Right? You don't, you don't want that. You want it to be genuine. Right. You want to be able again. That's building, as Jason said, ground to fight from in the future, where you do have to have maybe a negative conversation. Well, at least I have some, some wasta with you. I built a little bit of rapport. Right. You know, here's a couple that I wrote down that I, that I see how hard you worked on that, you know, and I'm proud of you not giving up. Right. You show kindness today, and that's what Jesus wants us to do. God has great plans for you. I can see it, you know, those little things, right? And it might sound corny, you might feel cheesy doing it, but as a father, you're pouring life into your children. That's what you have to remind yourself. And I want to give the biblical example of this before I turn it back over to Jason is David to Solomon. You know, as David's getting ready, after all David has done, he's getting ready to punch out first Kings 2, 2 and 3. David calls Solomon to be strong, but to also follow God's ways. Fathers, we have the deep and important responsibility to prepare our children with wisdom. Not just worldly success, not just how to run a business, just how to be a professional athlete, if that's what you're hoping that they're going to do, not just to be whatever it is in the world. You're to give them wisdom and help them have discernment on how to move through the world so they can find that success that they're looking for.
[00:21:36] Speaker A: No, that's great. You know, I had a thought and it just jumped right out of my head. Thank you. Phobia.
No, as you do, you gotta. As a dad or as a parent, let me share something with you. That the prophet has no honor in his own home.
[00:21:55] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:21:56] Speaker A: Your kids will point out every single mistake that you make. Yeah, they just will.
So that's where this coming to be. Very true and very honest. Have I made mistakes? Heck, yeah. I have. You know, have I messed up? Sure, yeah. What I try to do is I go, look, I made a mistake. You know, maybe I got angry and I'm like, you know, it's wrong. God knows it's wrong. Me and him are going to talk about that. And, you know, I shouldn't have got upset. I'm going to move forward.
It's. As dads, you got to be very purposeful in where you're guiding and where you're not. As a dad, this always struck me, you're not there to be a teenager again. Right. You're. You're not there as a parent. Doesn't matter if you're a dad, if you're a single mom or whatever. Dad, mom, whatever. You're no longer kids. God puts you in a specific order as being the parent and them being the children. He didn't make your peers together.
[00:22:56] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:22:57] Speaker A: And so you can't be sitting there watching whatever atrocious cartoon or TV show and then tell them, well, you can't watch that.
You know what I mean?
[00:23:10] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:23:11] Speaker A: You can't.
[00:23:12] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:23:12] Speaker A: You can't laugh at, you know, I don't know. Is Family Guy. Is that something? I don't.
[00:23:19] Speaker B: Yeah, that's. That's an old one. Kind of like the Simpsons is still around. Yeah.
[00:23:22] Speaker A: But like, you, you. Because kids see that and they're like, oh, my dad thinks that's funny. And it's good to have a sense of humor. But be careful what you laugh at because you also, you. You also advocate for. Right. Because kids want to be funny because they, they want you to love them.
[00:23:38] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:23:38] Speaker A: You got to be very, very purposeful. I love what you had to say about. What do you say? And so, you know, when Jesus was baptized, the phrase comes out. This is my beloved son, in whom I'm well pleased at the, you know, mount of transfiguration. This is my beloved Son, in whom I'm well pleased. As a matter of fact, those are the phrases that. That readily come to mind when God speaks about Jesus.
[00:24:03] Speaker B: Yeah, absolutely.
[00:24:05] Speaker A: As those forms of encouragement.
[00:24:08] Speaker B: No, And I think, you know, really what we're trying to tell you guys is, you know, you have to balance criticism and encouragement. And I love this principle that I studied out. And I've saw it once I saw it like it was like a light bulb of how the father, how Jesus and a lot of the patriarchs, a lot of people operated in the Bible once they got to the place where God was using them. Right. And it's called the blessing and the warning. Right. Jacob blessing his sons, Genesis 49:1 and 2. He gave them both blessings and warning. You see, Jesus replicate this in the New Testament when he was talking about, you know, various things using the parables. It was a blessing or there's a warning, you do the right thing, right? The parable of the talents, for example, give you something and trust you with a resource. Think about your children. You're entrusted with that. There are blessings and warnings that go along with the parenting and having those conversations, you know, and fathers, we have to balance that affirmation and the correction to get to that place where you're really spiritually leading your, your, your children. Right? And it's very, very important. You know, look at again, Deuteronomy, right? The, the book of the law. There's blessings and there's warnings there. That, that is a, to me, like a big principle in how the Lord relates to us. God relates to us. As far as love, correction and affirmation. Hey, I want you to be successful, right? He says in John 10:10, I came to give you an abundant life. Right? Yeah, that's what Jesus tell you. But there's also, hey, you have to have some discipline. You have to be obedient. It's not this whole like, I just do whatever I want and you're gonna give me what I want. No parent does that, right? Well, I shouldn't say that.
[00:25:52] Speaker A: Oh, there's some free range parents out there, right?
[00:25:54] Speaker B: No good and loving parent just gives a child exactly what they want all the time because that's really not loving them. Right? And so there's a balance. That's the whole point of what I'm trying to make here. What lesson do you think you're really teaching? You know, how did God want. Slow down for a minute before we go into this parenting mode and ask the question guys out there, you know, what does God want? How. How does he want me to handle this? Is there some kind of, you know, analog that I can find in the Bible? And that's, that's finding that balance, Jason.
[00:26:26] Speaker A: No, you know, with everything you do, it's a message, right?
And it's purposeful. Do you know that by the way, people read body language way more than they listen to what comes out of people's mouth? Oh, yeah, they absolutely do. And if you've been married any given length of time, you know that. Very true. Because your wife may tell you it's okay or you may get the. Our favorite restaurant is. It's up to you. I don't care. I've never found that place. I try.
[00:26:55] Speaker B: But it's delicious, by the way. When you get there.
[00:26:58] Speaker A: I have no idea. I've never made it. Yeah, that's always a contentious time. But you're you're a parent, and it goes with your. With your spouse, it goes with anybody. It's purposeful conversations. Right.
And. And, you know, you got to understand the situation. You also got to know where do you want people to go? And. And I think a lot about the restoration. It's hard to talk about parenting and not talk about the parable of the lost son. And we phrase that the parable of the lost son. As a matter of fact, my King James, it's. It's written in bold above, you know, in Luke, chapter 15, verse 11. It's written right above it. But really, there's two sons there, and neither one of them.
We talked earlier about kids are more than the genetics you make make up. Neither one of those represent or neither one of those were a mirror of the father. Right. The first one left and goes into the world, but he returns.
[00:27:55] Speaker B: Sure.
[00:27:56] Speaker A: And, you know, it's so interesting. He's like, I'll just eat the pigs slop. I'll just, you know, whatever. He's out there doing that. And he goes, I'll just be a servant. But when he comes back, his dad even cuts him off where he says, I'll be a servant. Like, he doesn't get to it or say those words and, you know, and he welcomes it. But the other son who's in there, he's not exactly the. The prime example, although he stayed and worked. You look at what he has to say in there, and he says he can't. You know, let's see here. He says, I serve thee. It's always I and me. He says, you never gave me a kid that I might take and might make. May have a party with my friends.
He wasn't interested in being with the father either. He just didn't leave.
[00:28:42] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah.
[00:28:44] Speaker A: You know, but the father was gracious to both those. He. He stepped out of the situation.
And that's. That's last week we talked about get to the balcony. And you've got to step away from that emotion and go, this is where we are. And this is where I need to guide to that restoration moment. Right.
[00:29:02] Speaker B: Yeah. No, I love it, Jason. And I think, you know, I'll. I'll put my final thoughts in there. And I think we're going to probably have a Jonathan's leftovers here for this, for this week, because there's. There's so much guys that we wanted to kind of give you, but please look for that on Wednesday, the Jonathan's leftovers for this, for this episode. But I guess My final thoughts would be just a couple of key takeaways. You know, correction should build up and not tear down. When you're doing it from biblical place, when you're doing it as God wants us as men in his kingdom to do, you're building up and you're not tearing down. And that doesn't mean it's not a hard conversation. That doesn't mean that there's some little stern correction that goes in there, but you're building up and you're not tearing them down. Encouragement should point children towards their God given identity. There's no mistakes.
God forbid that someone out there, you're yelling, you're telling your kid you're just a big mistake or whatever. Think about the old smoking the bed at Jackie Gleason, you know, kind of moments. You don't want to tell a child that. Right. Because God has a purpose for them. And your role as a father, right, is to help bring that out, that they can honor the kingdom. And intentional conversations really do bring those stronger relations. You want to have a stronger relationship with your children, your spouse, whoever it is, you have to be very intentional and how you're communicating. And as Jason set out, very well, if you have a look on your face, if you have your screen in front of you while you're trying to have a conversation, you are sending messages that you may not even want to or even intending to send. But again, you have to be very, very clear on how you're speaking with those if you want to improve your communication with your children and those around you.
[00:30:44] Speaker A: Yeah, you know, is that kind of my final thoughts is this. And when it comes to delivering a message, you know, there's, there's multiple parts. It's the speaker, the listener, and the somewhere in between, what's interpreted. Right. You never realize the impact of the words you say. And this is, I'm gonna let a little truth out. I've had people come up to me and go, do you remember when you told me this? And what I really want to say back is, is I'm lucky if I remembered what I had for supper last night. But.
And I've had people say things to me that were, that I extrapolated pearls of wisdom from. Right. And there were things that people said that I didn't or that people said that I took as hurtful and they didn't mean it. You know, I think about the very comical scene on that, that famous movie Talladega Nights. He's like, you know, if you're not first, you're last. And that's what the mantra that kid lived by. Ricky Bobby lived by his whole life and his dad later in life goes. I have no idea. I could have been high when I said that.
[00:31:50] Speaker B: Right?
[00:31:51] Speaker A: And so a whole lot of parents don't realize that when you're, maybe you're not, maybe you're not high, but you're, you're distracted by the iPhone, the other things or whatever. And you've now told this kid what value is, how to measure value, and they take that ruler and they measure themselves from that point forward and they go, if I'm not this, then that's it. Right? So you got to be super purposeful in what you have to say.
[00:32:19] Speaker B: No, I love it, Jason. And that is a great way to wrap up yet another great episode of the Jonathan Project Podcast. If you found this episode or any of our episodes great, please reach out to us at the Jonathan Project Podcast podcast podcastmail.com Again, the Jonathan Project podcast gmail.com this episode and every episode comes out every Tuesday morning at 6am at least Eastern time. Earlier maybe where you're at, but you can find it on Spotify, Apple, iHeartRadio, Amazon Music. You can find the Jonathan Project Podcast. Please subscribe download. Our link to subscription will always be in our comments for all of these episodes. And on behalf of Jason, thanks for yet another wonderful time spent here talking about a really important conversation. Join us on Jonathan's Leftovers. We're going to kind of go over and talk about a little bit more that we couldn't get into this episode. But thanks for all your support and prayers for everyone out there, and we'll see you again next week.
[00:33:22] Speaker A: All right, See you.
